Sunday, August 27, 2006

Local Union #4 of the Drunk Skanks

I was awoken from sleep this morning at roughly 3:30 am by loud voices. I could hear a group of girls bantering in what I surmised was a drunken state. I thought they were quite rude for walking the streets at this hour waking residents up, but I lay in bed believing they would soon pass and I could go back to sleep. They did not pass. The voices continued. I got up to peer through a window and lo and behold there lay four figures lying under the maple tree in our sideyard. I got up and dressed and went outside to ask them to leave. When they saw me two of the girls began to apologize and that they would move on, but one was not moving saying "I'm not fucking moving. Tell him to fuck off". I became angry and began yelling at them to get the fuck out of my yard. I approached them and after a few more word exchanges these girls (they must have been 16 year olds) became aggressive and wanted to fight me. One girl charged at me and when I put up my fists to defend myself she stepped back and said "You would hit a girl?" Doh! One of the other girls was being held back by her friend. Not wanting to partake in more of this nonsense I went inside to call the police. While inside I heard some loud slamming against the house and ran back out to see the girls running down the street "Run, he's calling the cops". I quickly found the cause of the noise; they had taken an eavestrough transfer pipe and destroyed it. I called the cops and after 15 minutes of waiting I got in the car and looked for the girls. After 15 minutes I went home and was met by the police....finally. In a small town I am confident I will find the identity of these girls relatively soon. I was a shit disturber at that age, but never was I so disrespectful or blatantly stupid as these four skanks. As the police officer sarcastically put it "How could you dare ask them to leave your yard when all these yards belong to them."

Saturday, August 26, 2006

The First 50 Duds

For those of you enamoured by the might of the US military and their claims of smart bombs and the accuracy of them and other guided weaponry, here is a little fact for you. The first 50 guided missiles entering Iraq all (ALL) missed the intended target. US patriot missile accuracy in taking out scud missiles during Desert Storm according to Pentagon was 100%. The actual accuracy by the end of the war was 9%.
Captain Trouble and the Fog of Smog Update

Other than Thurs morning smelling like burnt plastic across the greater part of the GTA the air was pleasant. Wed. we caught up with some old friends and their kids at a water park and in the process wound up having to make plans on receiving them for visits over the next few weekends. Thurs I went to Kensington Market and was unimpressed. It is much more pretentious than I remember, although the junkies do add a certain colour to the drab scenery. I met up with my wonderful sis for lunch at a place called JunJun Sushi. It totally rocks. I recommend the dinner box #1. Soup, 6 pieces of sushi (3 cucumber, 3 salmon) teriyaki chicken, sticky rice, tempura vegetables and shrimp, salad, all for $8.00. You cannot walk out of the place hungry. It was so much fun hanging out with my sis. Seems we rarely get to do that much any more, but we take full advantage when we do making the trip home the second best part of it all.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Espresso Love

My buddy Mario visited a few weekends ago with his wife Darlene and their little beauty Hannah. They are probably our closest friends and we look forward to hanging with them in Toronto. Regretably, I have to return his espresso maker which he forgot on his last visit here. I have come to look forward to having my shot of the savoury brew each day when its time to relax by playing a game or reading blogs on the computer or reading a book or the paper. I just finished one and have suddenly found the energy to get done what needs to be done. Later freaks.
Captain Trouble and the Fog of Smog

The latest installment of "Toronto Visit Time". Don't get me wrong, I am looking forward to seeing friends and family, but I hate (H-A-T-E) going to the big city. I feel claustrophobic with so many people shuffling about and the constant noise really grates on my nerves making my fave part of the trip the part when we leave. I do look forward to seeing my greater known sibling and her Paco, shopping Kensington and going for Japanese food, but how I wish all of the above were here. I must pack soon. After one more entry perhaps.
Living the Life

Theo decided to paint our bedroom yesterday of which I was not able to help due to my back injury, so, with Rain in Toronto with grandmother, it left me alone with Cassidy. What to do what to do. We hopped on the bike and rode the 5 minutes to the beach and had a lovely day. The beach here isn't so busy on the weekdays (compared to the weekend which is a madhouse) so we quickly found a space on the west shore (most people hang at the east shore close to the shops) and hit the surf. Beatiful warm day with a strong breeze creating good sized waves. When the waves hit the sandbars they get good elevation and you can body surf. We swam for almost 2 hours (water was warmer than my pool) and then rested for awhile on the beach. Then we walked the beach to Mr. B's (no relation to Mrs. B's in the Soo) for homemade icecream. Swam some more and then got back on the bike to visit the grandparents. Home for supper and then another swim this time in our pool. Bath time for Cassidy and then bed and then lying on the couch watching a movie with Theo (who was in a "good" mood *wink*). I mean how many other places can you enjoy this lifestyle? I can't walk too far right now (health is improving quickly though) but I can bike for long periods of time making the whole town easily accessible. What I love the most is that while riding around just about everyone says hello (if they don't say hi chances are they are tourists). Cassidy has picked up on this and she frantically waves to every passer-by saying "Hello you there", "Hey guys. Its me, Cassidy" "Hello everbody. Thats my Dad. He's riding the bike." I keep saying to everyone that we live in Pleasantville and so far no one who has visited has said otherwise. Its a big reason we have visitors all summer which is fine by me. Share the wealth I say.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

News Etc....

Have been a busy little git over the last few weeks. Summer time in Port Dover means lots of visitors. I think we've had maybe two weekends over the summer where we weren't entertaining friends or family. Not that I am complaining. Friends and family are important. Speaking of family, my bro-in-law busted his leg up pretty good recently. He will be fine, but the poor bastard has endured a great deal of pain over the last week. At least he broke it playing hockey. I mean, its hell trying to explain that you got an injury by curtsying to a flock of geese or slipping on some stinky cheese or both. He will, however, have one hell of a time getting through American customs with that plate in his ankle. Advice for Cap: resist temptation to gain deep suntan.
I have had the house to myself this afternoon so I worked out for a few hours, showered and then grabbed some pasta salad to eat while watching some tv. This movie called "Hackers" was on starring Angelina Jolie ('95). What a gawd awful piece of tripe. Why is it movies with computer technology involved as part of the plot always show us these screens of wavy psychadelic imagery and/or nuclear green backgrounds with white lettering while some really bad actor under a worse director punches keys at light speed and hacks into a government database containing top-secret weapon schematics only to be found out by some flunky FBI/CIA agent who calls his superior to say "Sir, I think you should take a look at whats happening on the main frame" and when he does the superior always says "Run a trace and get me that address. Now!" So of course they trace it and begin chasing the hacker all over America blowing up every other home they encounter along the way while the hacker uses his savvy to elude capture by using his awesome hacking skills (the same skills that allowed him to be detected by the government and his address found). The nice thing about these movies is that all that is neccessary of you is to watch the first 15 minutes to judge how good or bad the acting and effects will be because you know the story already.
One of the many advantages to living in a farming community is the availability of cheap fresh produce. I went to the farmers market yesterday and filled my fridge with fruit, vegetables and cheese for under $15.00. The carrots were so sweet that they should have been sold as candy. I made carrot salad last night to go with the salmon.
Carrot Salad: 4 to 5 shredded carrots, 1/2 tin of shredded pineapple, raisins, crushed walnuts, slivered almonds, lemon juice, 2 tbsp's mayo. Mmmmm.
Planked Salmon: marinate salmon in olive oil, lemon juice and lime juice for a few hours. Spice with lotsa garlic, sweet basil, townhouse lemon & herb seasoning, townhouse roasted garlic and red pepper seasoning, squeeze one orange over top, thinly slice one orange and arrange over salmon, lay salmon on cedar cooking planks and place on barbeque at low heat for about 30 minutes.
Sister came to visit us last weekend. We took her to a huge antiques warehouse in Waterford and then for lunch. After that we drove the shoreline from Port Rowan back to Port Dover. The whole time I could not help myself from selling the area and pointing out every house for sale or every area I liked. I keep hoping by some twist of fate her and Cap will move this way instead of Kingston way.
Well, the gang is back from their travels and so duties beckons me. Thanks for dropping in and for that I wish you love, happiness and well-being. Good on ya'!

Thursday, August 03, 2006

On Prophecy

We had a big storm pass here last night. I didn't know if I was in a storm or at a rave with all the thunder base and lightning strobes. All that lightning killed the power in the area so I fired up my portable radio and dialed through the waves. I latched onto an American talk radio station based out of Cleveland whose guest was an authority on prophecy. His view on the Israeli move into outside territory was that it was a push to ensure any missile attacks would fall short of major centers in Israel. His reasoning was that since Jewish prophecies foretold of WWII they hold some sway on Jewish policy. Prophecies point to the year 2006 at the end of the Jewish year (which makes that roughly in the last three days in Sept. on our calendar) as the beginning of WWIII. It is called the war of the knife (rough translation) since it is thought to be a war to the end (total annihilation with armies running out of weapons and turning to knives). So, with the distinct possibility that prophecies (and religion of course) are guiding and driving foreign policy for Israel one has to ask if the prophecies are actually true or are they fictional stories that are becoming self-fulfilled. I believe the latter to be more accurate. There have been countless prophecies foretold by numerous groups of humans throughout time. Some have come to be while many have not. I tend to believe that a great number of prophecies that have come to be are mostly coincidence or based on forecasting possible futures much like science fiction writers have done. Until humans can let go of religious dogma and superstitious forecasting as well as relinquishing the power to follow these downward paths, our race is run. This is not to say we must give up the idea of spiritualism and its positive influences, but we need desperately to realize that spirtuality is far different than religious zeal or blind faith in prophecies. Even if prophecies were based on real visions from spiritualist our fate would not be sealed. Fate is life. It is ever changing. We have the power to change the outcome of this world although it seems highly unlikely we will.

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Indian vs. White Perspectives

White: Never trust a man who will not partake in at least one cocktail with you.
Indian: Never trust white men offering you alcohol.

White: A smart man understands the phrase "Hell hath no fury like a womans scorn" and knows when to keep quiet and stay out of her way.
Indian: The rabbit that remains the stillest lives the longest.