Sunday, December 31, 2006

As 12:00 am Approaches

I want to wish everyone a happy new year now in case I pass out in the next few minutes. I am sick. So very sick. I just want to get drunk and crash cars. No pity replies please. Just be good to yourselves and I thank you for being in my life. Make a resolution you have a chance of keeping and try to do something nice for a loved one today like fetching them a barf bucket or some gravol.

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

The Godfather of Soul



James Brown has died at 73. His heart gave out under the stress of severe pneumonia early Christmas morning. Many will remember him for his troubled times during the 80's and 90's for his arrests involving drug possession, firearms violations and domestic violence which tarnished an otherwise stellar career. When Martin Luther King was assasinated and riots broke out, it was Brown who was called in to help quell the situation. He preached love and played a large part in pushing the movement for racial pride. When "Say It Out Loud--I'm Black and I'm Proud" was released it was a landmark statement which pretty much brought an end to the term "coloured". He was proof that words and music could help change the world.

Sunday, December 24, 2006

One For the "Ladies"

This is for all you guys out there that are stuck with no gift for that special someone in your life. When diamonds or other extravagant gifts just don't relate your feelings of how you feel about her. If you really have that desire to show her how you really feel, perhaps this is a gift you should consider.

Friday, December 22, 2006

Magic Moments

It was 1992 at Buckeye Lake, Ohio where I was attending a Grateful Dead concert that I met Vernon. At Dead concerts there were very often areas sectioned off where people sold/bartered wares which was called Shakedown Street. I wasn't feeling all that great so I lay down on a patch of grass in the shade. People walked by me asking if I was alright to which I responded I was fine although I could feel another headache coming on and I actually felt like crap. Like really hungover without the benefit of having gotten drunk. Yet another person asked me if I was alright and I told him yes I was. He knelt down beside me and asked if I was sure. "Just feeling run down is all. No worries." He told me his name and that he was a naturopath/chiropractor from the Smokey Mountains and asked me specific questions about my health to which I played along. Within a few minutes he had me with one leg in the air with one hand on my shoulder and the other at the base of my neck. I then felt and heard a quick violent snap and.....relief. I was energized, headache free, awake. I felt marvellous. I offered him money which he would not take, but eventually he let me buy him a grilled cheese sandwhich and a beer. He told me of his life in the mountains where he bartered for his services. People would bring him chickens, veggies and goats etc... to pay for his healing hands and some would pay cash so he had a comfortable life. He was full of good energy and he passed that onto me. The rest of the day and evening I had one of the best times of my life which I shared with anyone and everyone around me. Amazing what a little healing and postive energy can do for a person and another and another and another....

Thursday, December 21, 2006

A Morning In the Life

It's 8:10am, my girls are not yet dressed and their bus will arrive at 8:25am. They have two speeds: slow and stop. Rain is trying to push clothes for Cass under the bathroom door. Cass is yelling from the bathroom "No, not that one". I open the door to see Cass in nothing but underwear attempting to pull a shirt over her head. I take her into the den to her dresser and find pants for her, but no socks. I ask Rain to look for socks in the clean clothes basket we haven't sorted, folded or put away. I throw my jeans and some socks on telling the girls to go put their shoes on. I approach the landing to see Rain with her ski-doo boots on and Cass with one shoe on and the visible foot without a sock on it. I look at Rain "I though I asked you to get her socks". She responds "Oh yea. I got the umbrellas". Which is all fine and good if it were raining which it's not. I ask her to get socks. Meanwhile Cass has managed to change her long sleeve shirt to a t-shirt so I try to find a sweater for her. Rain comes back with two different socks which at this point no longer matters to me. I put them on Cass and find a sweater that fits her. I get their coats on, mittens, backpacks and I can hear the bus approaching. "Run!!!!" I yell as I grab them by the hands and race across the street (looking both ways) to just make the bus on time. As I re-enter the house I see my reflection in the mirror on our landing. I forgot to put a hat on and my hair is standing in a semi-mohawk. My eyes are sleep covered and I have coffee stains all over the front of my shirt. And I think "I forgot to brush their hair".

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Verification

I always get the craziest verification codes. You might see a code like trggui or xzvcdd, but not me. Mine are always defjgtoddlqokalesjxnhdui and zlxkpqaivuyfjdtg. And not that easy to read lettering either. The ones I am presented with require inspection and concentration and I must recheck to make sure I have it right which very often it isn't. I have pissed off a few people in my time so maybe the person running the verification thing is someone from my past. Perhaps an old flame (or spark) or someone who had the misfortune of trying to have a conversation with me when I was really drunk. Maybe it's revenge for all the bad poetry I wrote while intoxicated. Not only did it suck and make no sense, it was pretty much illegible unless you were drunk enough to read drunk.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Fruitcake Lady

This may be old hat for you people, but it's the first I heard of her. Thought she was cute.


Sunday, December 17, 2006

It's Up

We let the girls do most of it and they had a blast. They were so focused on the task that they finished the job very quickly.

Friday, December 15, 2006

Peter Boyle



The mainstream will know Peter Boyle as Frank on "Everybody Loves Raymond", but Boyle had a very lengthy and respectable portfolio of work dating back to the mid 60's with roles in films such as Taxi Driver, Joe, Young Frankenstein, Medium Cool, The Candidate and Monster's Ball. To me, Boyle always seemed to tower over the other characters in his films. He was bigger than life and seemed to dominate the screen even besides the likes of Robert DeNiro and Robert Redford. A good friend of John Lennon who was Boyle's best man at his wedding to Lorraine Alterman of Rolling Stone. In the early 90's Boyle had to learn to speak again after suffering a stroke. I have always liked Boyle even though I am no fan of Ray Romano. My fave tv appearance was when he played Clyde Bruckman on the X-Files.

"I don't think I would be an actor if I was all that intelligent." P. Boyle

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

And the Answers Are

1) The African Queen
2) Airplane
3) Animal Crackers
4) Annie Hall
5) Apocalypse Now
6) Being There
7) Bladerunner
8) Blazing Saddles
9) The Breakfast Club
10)Bringing Up Baby
11)Caddyshack
12)The Caine mutiny
13)The Ciderhouse Rules
14)Cool Hand luke
15)The Court Jester
16)Dirty Harry
17)Dr. Strangelove
18)Duck Soup
19)Duck Soup
20)Ferris Bueller's Day Off
21)Five Easy Pieces
22)The Godfather Part II
23)Harold and Maude
24)Harvey
25)In the Heat of the Night
26)It's a Wonderful Life
27)The King of Comedy
28)MASH
29)Mister Roberts
30)Animal House

How did you make out?
Do You Know Your Movies?

See if you can guess what movies these quotes come from:

1) "Nature, Mr. Allnut, is what we are put into this world to rise above."

2) "Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue."

3)"One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas, I don't know."

4) "Don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love."

5) "I love the smell of napalm in the morning."

6) "I like to watch."

7) "I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die."

8) "Excuse me while I whip this out."

9) "Don't mess with the bull, young man. You'll get the horns!"

10) "It isn't that I don't like you, Susan, because after all, in moments of quiet, I'm strangely drawn toward you; but, well, there haven't been any quiet moments!"

11) "Cinderella story. Outta nowhere. A former greenskeeper, now, about to become the Masters champion. It looks like a mirac... It's in the hole! It's in the hole! It's in the hole!"

12) "Ah, but the strawberries! That's, that's where I had them."

13) "Good night, you princes of Maine, you kings of New England."

14) "What we've got here is failure to communicate."

15) "The pellet with the poison's in the vessel with the pestle. The chalice from the palace has the brew that is true."

16) "You've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well, do ya, punk?"

17) "Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room!"

18) "I could dance with you 'til the cows come home. On second thought, I'd rather dance with the cows 'til you came home."

19) "I suggest that we give him ten years in Leavenworth, or eleven years in Twelveworth."

20) "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it."

21) "Now all you have to do is hold the chicken, bring me the toast, give me a check for the chicken salad sandwich, and you haven't broken any rules."

22) "Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer."

23) "L-I-V-E! Live! Otherwise, you got nothing to talk about in the locker room."

24) "Well, I've wrestled with reality for thirty-five years, Doctor, and I'm happy to state I finally won out over it."

25) "They call me Mister Tibbs!"

26) "Look, Daddy. Teacher says, 'Every time a bell rings an angel gets his wings.'"

27) "Better to be king for a night than schmuck for a lifetime."

28) "Oh, Frank, my lips are hot. Kiss my hot lips."

29) "Captain, it is I, Ensign Pulver, and I just threw your stinking palm tree overboard. Now, what's all this crud about no movie tonight?"

30) "Over? Did you say 'over?' Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell, no!"

Answers to follow.
*Le Sigh*




My beautiful wife. She inspires me, she is sexy, smart, understanding, patient, loving, a great mother, loyal and for some crazy reason she is totally smitten with me. And I feel totally blessed to have two girls with her. And everything else I want to write is way too mushy and I can't have you all thinking I'm a softy. If you are thinking I am a softy I will frick you up, man.

Sunday, December 10, 2006

Under the Radar

A couple of films that have probably passed under yours (and most peoples) radar screens which offer the viewer an engaging story with superb performances are Big Bad Love and The World's Fastest Indian.



The World's Fastest Indian is a story about New Zealander Burt Munro (portrayed by Anthony Hopkins) who, in his advanced years and heart trouble, travelled to America and the Salt Flats of Bonneville to break the streamlined under 1000cc land speed record on his custom built Indian Motorcycle. The write up of the film does it no justice. Hopkins is amazing in this film delivering a character performance that only a master could pull off and the direction is tight. Whether the storyline appeals to you or not is of no consequence. See this film for Hopkins performance.



Big Bad Love is one of those films that definitely does not possess mass appeal which, to me, is not necessarily a bad thing. Arliss Howard plays the lead, a troubled Vietnam vet trying to get his writing published while struggling with alcohol, mood swings and his separation from his children and his wife played by Debra Winger (who is his real life wife). Strong performances are turned in by Howard, Debra Winger, Paul LeMat, Rosanna Arquette and Angie Dickinson. Howard was the executive producer, director and screenwriter for the film giving the Larry Brown short stories a cohesive flow capturing the moody, emotional, melancholy yet still hopeful essence of his offerings. Tom Waits composed the score for the film.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Tsunami

The Fifth Estate aired "Tsunami: Untold Stories" last night which dealt with the natural disaster in 2004 that ravaged the coasts of Sumatra, Thailand, Indonesia, India, East Africa, Maldives,Myanmar, Maylasia and Sri Lanka. I found it interesting that, as we near the second anniversary of this tragedy, how little news coverage this received after the initial hit. The outpouring of support in the moment was swift and substantial, yet we failed by far to bring relief to the areas victims as far as long term support goes. Like most major events that span our globe, the news spreads quickly and most of us become caught up in the drama. Yet, within a relatively short period of time, we go on to forget about an event long before the people who suffer through them can return to some form of normalcy. Watching a 15 year old Sri Lankan boy talk about his ordeal, how he clung onto a bed while his mother and sisters were washed away to their deaths, was heart wrenching. Watching him articulate his experience calmly, almost emotionless, while his eyes exposed the pain clearly. The Norwegian couple who got separated and their separate experiences. The father with two of their three children, one of which is 8 months old and lost in the wall of water they became entrapped in. I am not saying that I am better than anyone else out there by writing this. It is not like I am any different from the majority. I guess I just wish we were not so concerned about citizenship, religion, boundaries, etc... meaningless things in times of disaster. Nature does not recognize our differences. Nature does not discriminate. Bleeding heart liberal? Commy? Idealist? How about human being.

http://www.cbc.ca/fifth/tsunami/

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

This Is Hilarious

Theo and I were laying in bed watching tv when this commercial came on. We nearly pissed ourselves laughing at the uber cheese. It aired just before America's Next Top Model which is also uber cheese. Can we cater to a lower denominator? I am sure they are working that out as I write and you peruse.

Dog Day

It's a dog eat dog world out there and this little one is already one step up on the competition. So what if she has misinterpreted what society believes that statement to be. No one would mess with her for the sheer fact alone that they could never keep a straight face.


Tuesday, December 05, 2006

A Western Classic



The first time I watched this movie was in the basement of our old house on Cartier St. when I was 15 years old. I would come home after partying with friends and make a few peanutbutter and jam sandwiches and head to the basement to watch a movie. I believe it was CBC that would air two late movies in a row beginning at midnight and they were usually of an adult variety. These are the movies that changed my life. They were mind altering experiences that directed me towards a more worldly view. McCabe and Mrs. Miller, Mash, Little Faus and Big Halsey, Downhill Racer, Serpico,Jeremiah Johnson, The Parallax View, Harry and Tonto, Harold and Maude, Midnight Cowboy, Little Big Man, Five Easy Pieces, Being There. I could go on and on. Some of the best American cinema was created in the 60's and 70's. Movies full of character and meaning. Deep plots that delved into the human condition; the social heartbeat. Plots attacked the military/industrial complex, human rights violations and injustices, corruption. In those days of film directors were given a wider creative birth. Film was more experimental than the "tried and true" formula of today's films. Sometimes we are thrown a great film in this age, but never in the same frequency of years before.