Day After Tomorrow

I got your letter today
And I miss you all so much, here
I can't wait to see you all
And I'm counting the days, dear
I still believe that there's gold
At the end of the world
And I'll come home
To Illinois
On the day after tomorrow

It is so hard
And it's cold here
And I'm tired of taking orders
And I miss old Rockford town
Up by the Wisconsin border
But I miss you won't believe
Shoveling snow and raking leaves
And my plane will touch tomorrow
On the day after tomorrow

I close my eyes
Every night
And I dream that I can hold you
They fill us full of lies
Everyone buys
About what it means to be a soldier
I still don't know how I'm supposed to feel
About all the blood that's been spilled
Look out on the street
Get me back home
On the day after tomorrow

You can't deny
The other side
Don't want to die
Any more than we do
What I'm trying to say,
Is don't they pray
To the same God that we do?
Tell me, how does God choose?
Whose prayers does he refuse?
Who turns the wheel?
And who throws the dice
On the day after tomorrow?

Mmmmmmm...
I'm not fighting
For justice
I am not fighting
For freedom
I am fighting
For my life
And another day
In the world here
I just do what I've been told
You're just the gravel on the road
And the one's that are lucky
One's come home
On the day after tomorrow

And the summer
It too will fade
And with it comes the winter's frost, dear
And I know we too are made
Of all the things that we have lost here
I'll be twenty-one today
I've been saving all my pay
And my plane will touch down
On the day after tomorrow
And my plane it will touch down
On the day after tomorrow

--Tom Waits--

Tom Waits was on The Daily Show last night. I have always liked his music and film work, but even more, I think the guy is just the coolest. I think I admire him so much because he's always done his own thing. Jon Stewart mentioned that he respected Waits for not jumping from fad to fad like Madonna. And while I have nothing against Madonna, Stewart makes a great point. Waits remains true to his expression of the self he has created or chosen to portray to us. And I believe fans of Waits are rarely if ever dissapointed with his offerings.

Death of a Master Film Maker

Better late than never to give a shout out to the recently deceased Robert Altman Feb. 25, 1925-Nov. 20, 2006. Altman directed a few of my fave films including MASH, McCabe and Mrs. Miller, The Long Goodbye, Nashville, Shortcuts, Gosford Park. I always loved how he could draw me into a film to the point of forgetting where I was. I almost felt a part of the film. He never enjoyed the mass popularity of some of his peers, but I believe that due to his method of story telling. Never one to cater to the mainstream, Altman was a director for the intellectual/artistic audience. His free speaking improve dialogue added a touch more reality to his work and his way of overlapping dialogue and characters was masterful. I know many people who were not a fan of Altman, but I defy any one of them to not find at least one of his films in their list of classics.

What Would the Dude Do?

Sometimes you just gotta throw on some Bob, stretch out on the floor and say fuck it. Even if, when you open your eyes, you get socked in the jaw. You might as well make the best of it and at least trip on your induced dream state. Sometimes you eat the bar and sometimes the bar eats you.

The Man In Me by Bob Dylan

The man in me will do nearly any task,
And as for compensation, there's little he would ask.
Take a woman like you
To get through to the man in me.

Storm clouds are raging all around my door,
I think to myself I might not take it any more.
Take a woman like your kind
To find the man in me.

But, oh, what a wonderful feeling
Just to know that you are near,
Sets my a heart a-reeling
From my toes up to my ears.

The man in me will hide sometimes to keep from bein' seen,
But that's just because he doesn't want to turn into some machine.
Took a woman like you
To get through to the man in me.

What A Save

Off to the Riverview P.S. outdoor rink at roughly age 8. I wonder sometimes if the rink was more my home than our old Cartier St. residence. I know I spent many winters skating after school, home late for supper and back to the rink until bed time. This might be my fave pic of all time.

Act II, Scene I, Diversion

So, our great Canadian government wants to, and is, reneging on the Kyoto Protocal. This causes a great deal of flak for the Conservative Party, so what do they do? They create "The Clean Air Act". Yahooooooooo!!!! So, what does this act entail? Esentially, not a thing to improve our environment. Industry will remain free from constraints until 2020 and/or 2050 which does nothing about the immediate problem which requires action to be taken now and not in 15 to 25 years. In 15 years the government of Canada will have changed how many times? The Bill on greenhouse emissions will change how many times? Between all these government changes where will the action take place? How can action take place? This will be a revolving door issue that requires immediate action, yet no action will have time to take effect. The business sector reaction was priceless. "A very ambitious plan". The Canadian Vehicle Manufacturer's Assoc. said they thought it was good that Canada was harmonizing its plan with the U.S. So, Harper has adopted the George Bush plan on Clean Air which places no restrictions on industry with little chance for restrictions in the future. These two countries will do nothing (and it matters not who is in power) on reducing greenhouse gasses because they believe it will too greatly affect their economies. Even the Liberals who accepted the Kyoto Agreement had no real intention or means of reaching the targets set. Big business controls our government and economy even though the majority (is this really a democracy?) wants the environment to improve. I believe Chretien agreed to the Kyoto Accord only because he did not want to be the man to quash it and have that as his legacy. I do not believe he thought for a moment that Canada would actually follow through on the committment and he knew he would not be in power when that came to fruition. Until the masses of North America stand up and fight the powers that be, we will continue to see our quality of life deteriorate.

A Common Trait in Males

I ask you, what man does not enjoy playing with his rubber ducky? What man does not feel pride in his rubber ducky and revel in the opportunity to show it off?

I Know

I know many of you want to ask me questions about love and life and lovelife and other matters and I know many of you are asking yourselves "How does Trouble keep it together so well"? Here are some important tips to lead you on the right path.

1) Eat your veggies and not just the green ones although they are generally the best. Add some squash in there and some beets etc...

2) As my Uncle Colin used to say "Never piss in your own back yard".

3) When you are with your lover do not check out the eye candy.

4) Flattery, flattery and more flattery.

5) Do not talk too much. Listen more than you speak.

6) Get enough sleep every night.

7) Exercise.

8) Do not fart, burp, spit or pick at body crevices/orifices in public (you would be surprised at how important this rule is).

9) Only talk to strangers in public places out in the open. Trust me on this one.

10) Avoid cliches lest you appear unoriginal.

I realize I have left a lot of your questions unanswered, but I hope this list will help at least a little in dealing with your day to day business. If you need information on any topic, just drop me a line or two and I will do my best to steer you in the right direction.

That Confounded Communication Device

I am not answering the phone any more. If you call my number you will here an answering machine telling you---> "Hello. You've reached the home of Troubles, Theo, Rain and Cassidy. Please leave us a message." If I want to talk to you I will pick up before you finish your message or I will definitely call you back. This is the way it has to be. I cannot take the chance that the person calling will be a telemarketer, that blank air we often get these days or, even worse, one of my in-laws. More specifically, my mother-in-law or father-in-law. Why, you ask? I am glad you want to know. Here is an example: I awake this morning to have a lovely breakfast before my lovely Theo takes our lovely girls out on a few lovely errands. A few minutes later the phone rings and being that I am in such a great mood and feeling social I decide to pick up the receiver. It is my father-in-law. You need to understand that this is a man who has all the social skills of a four year old. If you have put on weight he is going to let you know about it. If you have done some work around the house he is going to belittle it. If you make a point in a conversation he is going to argue it and it does not matter if he is wrong or right. That has nothing to do with it. He just loves to argue and seems to thrive on people getting pissed off at him. He will also speak any faults he perceives you to have regardless of his own for he feels he is as close to perfect as people can get. My heart sank a little when I heard his voice, but I was in a good mood and I already picked up the call so....he asks me what I have been up to and when I tell him I have been doing a lot of yard work he asks what kind of work at this time of year. Eight of the large paper compost bags of leaves kind of work and he tells me that it is nothing and it is only half an hours work. I voice my disagreement and he tells me to "Come on, get serious" and I realize he is baiting me into an argument so I stop arguing. He starts fishing for more information to use as fodder and, being somewhat of a master on the subject, I deftly snuff out his foray until he quickly becomes bored of me and moves onto the rest of my family. Still not taking the bait he gets bored and says he will call back later. And there it is; the end of my conversation and the beginning of a pissy mood. So, I try to stay positive yet my thoughts take over and I ponder on how this is my life these days. Somewhat boring what with in-law squabbles and yard work and job hunting and telemarketers and phone calls and leaking pools and Christmas lights and cooking and Elton John and blogging and youtube and hockey and movies blah.... Five years ago I was jumping off cliffs into Lake Superior. Watching a yearling black bear with my oldest as she (the bear not my daughter) ate termites from an old stump. Swimming almost daily. Meditating. And then I catch myself. I have a very good life. So, I go to get cleaned up and then out for an adventure along a trail somewhere, or the beach at Longpoint or a ride to Waterford. And I will no longer think of my in-laws for the time being.

Unblogged Random Thoughts

I am soooo tired. My youngest is sucking the life right out of me. I have sat down to write on many occassions of late, but rarely seem to write with any coherence. This may be happening now. We shall see. Here is some stuff I have been thinking about:
Glad the Democrats did well in the election, not that I believe they will change much of anything. At least the Neo-cons will have a few more hoops to jump through.

Have been thinking about art as a means of pushing boundaries set by government and/or big business. I am seeing more and more angry voices out there who are trying to vent their frustrations about their worlds. The more oppessed our society becomes, the more injustice that happens, the more art we create? Perhaps one reaches a point of cynicism where they become proactive? The more boundaries set the more boundaries we must push?

Religion freaks me out. We can prove by carbon dating and archeological evidence that the human race began roughly 60,000 years ago and we can trace the migration of the race and the time areas of the world became inhabited. Yet, people are still killing each other over human-created ideologies. When your choice of religion is mainly dictated by your environment you should ask yourself why that is. Oh I could go on and on.

Theo and I were discussing how great our life is. Our biggest concern is that our pool is leaking. I bet that is unfathomable to a refugee in Africa. If you were a Somali refugee who fell asleep in Kenya and woke up in Canada you would think you had just won the lottery.

I just had my 41st birthday and am looking for a job until I go back to school. When I was 39 I could still get a job, but now that I am 41 it does not seem to be happening. I am too educated for a lot of the jobs or not educated enough for others. I only need 3 1/2 course for my degree. One thing about moving from Toronto is the amount of nepetism here is insane where it barely exists there.

What is with tv comercials? I watching the game the other night and this comercial starts off "We are here in the wild of the jungle to see the Kia Serento (whatever the hell it was called) in it's natural habitat". Are you fucking kidding me? They all suck like that. That is one industry that needs an extreme makeover.

I am going to go cook fish now. Bye.

Remembering Shirley

Once upon a time, long long ago, I attended an elementary school. In my last year (grade 8) our teacher was this real asshat named Larry, so, to say the least, this class was a little dysfunctional. In that class were two sisters named Susan and Shirley. They were twins, but you would never have known they were related. Susan was a big girl, powerful and rotund who wanted to fight me on a number of occasions, while Shirley was slender and mild and quiet. Susan had dark brown short hair and skin problems while Shirley had long blonde hair and milky smooth skin. After Christmas that year, Shirley was absent. She was absent more than even I was throughout the year to that point, but this stretched on for some time. We asked Susan where Shirley was and all she would say is that she was sick. When she had been away for nearly a month Susan said she was living somewhere else. About a month and a half passed and Shirley returned to school. We were all very nice to her because we thought she was really sick, but after a few days we could see that she was healthy physically. We all noticed she had changed somehow, but we didn't know how. A few weeks later Shirley overdosed. It shook the school, the staff, our class. We all felt so terrible for Susan. As closure our class was bused to a funeral home to say goodbye to Shirley. I remember how spent her mother looked and I remember how red Susan's eyes were from crying. Thinking back to Shirley's return to school I remembered how out of it she was. She had a difficult time communicating, she moved in slow motion, her eyes were glazed over, she was depressed. How our teacher didn't see that she was stoned out of her mind is beyond me, but I did allude to his personality earlier. Rumours were flying. We heard she was hanging out with bikers, that she was prostituting, that it was suicide, that it was an accident, that she had a much older boyfriend. It was hard to know what to think. Susan became very quiet after that. Everyone was very nice to her, but I think she just wanted life to be normal. Later in the year this guy who was called Hairlip called her a cow after school. I called him out for it and we fought. Our teacher Larry saw us fighting and came out to talk to us. He let us fight with the stipulation that it be a fair fight, but I think he just wanted Hairlip to kick my ass. The next day Larry yelled at me and said I was a dirty fighter, but I think it was because I won the fight and he was disappointed and needed to vent. Later on Susan came up to me and thanked me. It meant the world to me at the time.

A Few of My Thoughts On Lethargy

The Time Traveller's Wife

Back awhile ago in Toronto, while out with my sister, I picked up a copy of "The Time Traveller's Wife" by Audrey Niffenegger on her recommendation. I bought it thinking that my wife would probably love it, but I was skeptical about me ever picking it up. Weeks later, while indisposed in the bathroom, I began to peruse the book as it was the only reading material at hand. I immediately liked the writing style. It flowed even though the story hopped around so much. It was creative and had an interesting premise. With me, style counts for so much and Niffenegger had style. And so, I was hooked. I finished the book last night and sobbed like a school girl who got stood up for her prom. You know it's going to happen, you know what's coming, but there is just no bracing yourself when it comes. You tell yourself that it's just a story and that you are being irrational, but there is no way to stop yourself. Maybe what hit home for me is that I have, in recent years, become more and more afraid of my mortality since I now have more to live for. I am nearing the age of the male protagonist and being a father and devoted husband like him, it hit home for me. Thinking about the story I wondered if this fairytale was born from a relationship the author had with someone who died of cancer. Our memories flow in and out of time, yet are all here and now with us. A very well crafted story.

Sir Elton



It was my birthday yesterday and to celebrate my lovely wife took me to see Sir Elton John at Copps Coliseum in Hamilton. Although not as active, flamboyant or with the same vocal range he displayed when I saw him in Ottawa in the 80's, the guy can still really put on a great show. The performance began with "Funeral for a Friend (Love Lies Bleeding)" and included Tiny Dancer, Goodbye Yellow Brick Road (my fave) Bennie and the Jets, Crocodile Rock, Philadelphia Freedom, Rocket Man, Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters, Someone Saved My Life Tonight (awesome), Saturday Night's Alright for Fighting, while in between these classics he mixed in some of the new songs off of "The Captain and the Cowboy". The man is such a ham, but such a great showman. During "Bitch is Back" he lay across his piano striking a pose and then jumped off. I was worried he might break a hip, but amazingly he is still agile for his years. I have been lucky over the years to see some great acts like Elton, Elvis Costello, Joe Cocker, all of whom put on an amazing show and seem very passionate about their craft. Even if you are not a fan, the performances are worth the price of admission. We went with Theo's friends from work which was amusing in itself. While they are extremely nice people they are very straight-laced christians. When they asked me what church I went to I responded "The round one". They pressed on. "What's the round church"? "It's the one where the devil can't corner me". They let the subject drop then. On the way home Theo and I thought about how much our lives have changed. We used to follow the Grateful Dead and party like mad pagans and now we are going to Elton John concerts with a group of christians whose idea of partying is, well...going to an Elton john concert. Maybe that's not such a bad thing really. There have been a few concerts I attended over the years that I missed out on due to being trashed out of my mind.

Passing Gas

I had a women come to my door today to try to sign me up with a retail gas company. Their promise to you the consumer is that your rate will be fixed at a set amount so if the price of gas increases your bill will not. What they do not tell you is that on average you will pay more than you would by buying directly from the gas company. Today this woman tried to make me feel like I was missing out on a great deal. She tried to make me think that I had to buy gas from an "official retail distributor"; that it was like a new law that you weren't allowed to buy your gas directly from Union. She acted shocked that I had not signed up yet. She tried very hard to persuade me without ever getting into too much detail about the facts. When I told her that her plan didn't sound right to me and that I was going to call the gas company to verify the information she was handing me, she went into another spiel about how everyone was switching over. The more she talked the more tense I became. I began thinking 'Who does this woman think she is? Who does she think I am'? She soldiered on. I now completely understood that she thought she was smarter than me and that she was going to get me to sign her paper. She used my neighbours down the street, who apparently signed up, as more bait for me to sign. The more she talked the more aggresive she became and the more she tried to make me feel stupid. I hate people that try to make you feel inferior, so I bluntly said "Look, I am not signing up with you until I know all the facts. I will call the gas company Monday and will then come to a decision". She sneered at me and rolled her eyes. "Good luck, sir" as she walked away. I thought "Yea, fuck you scammer". I did research this out. By staying with my present situation I should realize a decrease of $18.00 in my overall gas bill from a year ago. If I had signed with this woman's company I would have paid an increase of $6.00 for a swing of $24.00 all of which would go to her comapny. That totally pissed me off.

Hacking Democracy

I watched this documentary this evening called "Hacking Democracy" which focuses on the computerized election balloting in America. It was scary to see how easily an election could be rigged. While one of the main manufacturers (Diebold) continued to stand by the failsafe security of their system a small group of truth seekers united to test this claim. Their investigations which involved finding files on the internet containing security codes, finding paper results in the garbage (which is illegal---these results must be kept in safe storage) and testing the program for fraud found that the claims of Diebold were completely inacurrate. The memory cards used in Diebold machines were supposed to be program free to which Diebold execs and their head of engineering vow is true. Yet, when Harri Hursti (computer analyst)examined the memory card he found that it contained an executable program which would allow a person to configure the tally of votes any way they wanted to. When tested by the crew after Hursti had altered the programming on the memory card, the paper tally of 2 yes and 6 no votes came out of the computer as 7 yes and 1 no vote. They then attempted to see if the main computer could recognize the alteration and were surprised to find that no trace of alteration could be detected. In a nutshell; fraud was easily possible with no record of the real count to say otherwise. What was even more scary was the fact that Sen. John Kerry during his run for presidency new fraud had been committed, yet, even though he had gathered a panel of legal experts to challenge the election process, bowed out in the end with a whimper. Gore had one polling station in Florida count his votes in negatives with his final total at -16,022, yet he did not pursue a challenge of the election results. The trouble is they could not prove it without a doubt because the official paper records were corrupted. The question still remains, however, why have the Democrats not challenged this issue with more furvor?

Snug in the Autumn Den